I have realized something lately. I'm focusing on the negatives in life rather than the positives. There is so much to be thankful for-and what a good time of year to think really long and hard about it.
::Sure, pregnancy is hard. But what about all the years I wanted nothing more than to be pregnant? We started trying to have a baby in 1995 and didn't have Lindsay until April of 2000. That's a long time (in my mind anyways) to want a baby. But I just keep thinking of the inconveniences of being pregnant. There are still women out there who would give ANYthing to just feel the way I do right now.
::Yes, my house is a mess. But during those years I mentioned above I wanted so badly to have toys in the house to trip over. And you know what? My house was a mess then too prob'ly. Just not with as cute of stuff.
::Money is tight. But, my husband has a job! So many don't. And I get to stay home with my children. Isn't that worth pinching a few pennies? I think so. I could probably go back to work (ok, not quite right now, but you know what I mean) but that would not be for me. I think I'll pinch a few more pennies and see what happens. We've always managed to eat, right? And we have a home. And a car-even a nice one!
::My husband does not clean the house. BUT he doesn't get all picky about how I do it (or lately-how I don't do it). I don't ever feel as if I'm going to be in "trouble" if the house is a wreck--I've known of some women who had that fear every day. How sad is that to feel that in your own home?
::My kids drive me crazy. But they are healthy enough to be loud and boisterous. Isn't that something to be thankful for? I agree! It definitely is. :)
So, I'm going to waddle on in and see why Haley is still asleep from her nap--it's 5:10 pm, guess that means a late bedtime huh? Then I'll trip over some toys and maybe fix some dinner. And you know what? In just a short time my husband will be home-because he does that every night. What a blessing is that? Oh, and for good measure I think I'll scratch a few mosquito bites. How nice it is to live in a place where it's warm enough to be outside to get them in November? And I mean that!
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
My Appointment
My dr laughed at me. She really did. This is after my mom laughed at me.
When I first went in the doctor asked me how I was feeling, I asked her for my epidural. Now.
When she measured me she said I am measuring 40 weeks (remember, I am 34). I asked her what we were waiting on-I thought she should walk me right on over to the hospital. Then we could get my first request taken care of and get this show on the road. She, unfortunately, did not agree with my course of treatment for this "condition" I have.
In positive news though...I only weigh 105 pounds. Seriously. That's what the girl that weighs you and checks your blood pressure and directs you to the potty to pee in a cup told me! Who am I to argue...I had my back to the scales...she could've been telling the truth, right? My blood pressure was good...
Here's the gist of the whole appointment: Looking good, baby is really big, let's see him in ultrasound in two weeks. Chuckle Chuckle. No, really I'm laughing because you're so cute. You're not fat anywhere but have a huge baby in front. Really? Ugh. She just couldn't see the backside of me due to the front side taking up her entire field of vision.
My mom pointed out that my breast reduction is looking great. (No, I did not have surgery...my belly has reduced them to less than normal proportions).
**in case you didn't get the humor, I really didn't expect to be walked to the hospital and delivered at 34 weeks, despite my discomfort-and to be quite frank, fear of how big this baby will be-I do NOT want him taken any earlier than need be. That will be at 38 weeks.
When I first went in the doctor asked me how I was feeling, I asked her for my epidural. Now.
When she measured me she said I am measuring 40 weeks (remember, I am 34). I asked her what we were waiting on-I thought she should walk me right on over to the hospital. Then we could get my first request taken care of and get this show on the road. She, unfortunately, did not agree with my course of treatment for this "condition" I have.
In positive news though...I only weigh 105 pounds. Seriously. That's what the girl that weighs you and checks your blood pressure and directs you to the potty to pee in a cup told me! Who am I to argue...I had my back to the scales...she could've been telling the truth, right? My blood pressure was good...
Here's the gist of the whole appointment: Looking good, baby is really big, let's see him in ultrasound in two weeks. Chuckle Chuckle. No, really I'm laughing because you're so cute. You're not fat anywhere but have a huge baby in front. Really? Ugh. She just couldn't see the backside of me due to the front side taking up her entire field of vision.
My mom pointed out that my breast reduction is looking great. (No, I did not have surgery...my belly has reduced them to less than normal proportions).
**in case you didn't get the humor, I really didn't expect to be walked to the hospital and delivered at 34 weeks, despite my discomfort-and to be quite frank, fear of how big this baby will be-I do NOT want him taken any earlier than need be. That will be at 38 weeks.
Monday, November 9, 2009
What do you think Meredith?
Ok, you doubted me when I said I had a 14 pound baby that was 26 inches long...what are you thinking now?
Last night I had one of those funny thoughts but slightly ridiculous. You know the kind. We all have them. Some people just don't admit it! Mine was this: we were at Target to do some registering for baby stuff and I had to go find Harold and the kids in the electronics department-Lindsay is the only other one interested in baby stuff ;)-and it's right next to the pharmacy at our Target...I saw the pregnancy tests and thought how funny it would be to buy a pregnancy test and see how the check-out person reacted. Come on. It would be funny. And if those tests weren't so darn expensive...I'd have DONE IT! :)
On my way to my doctor to see what she has to say about this full grown child I'm carrying in my womb like a fetus.
Saturday, November 7, 2009
Let the Nesting Begin!
Friday we were all set to go on a field trip to King Ranch and I was having some curious pains and weirdness that makes you a little uneasy when you're in the last weeks of pregnancy. When my mom didn't want me to go on the trip and reminded me how close I am to delivering this baby IT HIT ME! I am having a baby!? Seriously?? I have done almost NOTHING to prepare for this little guy! So, as I was driving to King Ranch (yes, I went) which is about an hour and a half away-a drive like that gives you plenty of time to think when the kids are all watching a movie in the back seat and being quiet...anyways, as I was saying, I was driving and thinking about all the things I have yet to do! I was tempted to start making a list right then and there as I drove...but figured that rates right up there with texting while driving. Not the best idea.
1. Pack my hospital bag.
2. Prepare my cloth diapers
3. Wash baby clothes
4. Put together a crib, a cradle...a dresser drawer, something for him to sleep in!
5. Buy a baby book (he can't be the only kid that doesn't have one in the family-that's a sure thing to get me on some talk show about how I ruined my child's life!)
6. CHRISTMAS SHOPPING
7. Christmas cards
8. Birth Announcements (I plan to make them, so I have to get started on what I can do before I have his stats-you know that he weighed 14 lbs and 3 oz and was 26 inches long)
9. Have the kids' pictures taken (because I'm sooooo way behind on this and I know that's not going to get better when I have 4 to take care of)
10. Clean. Clean. Clean (even though I'll still have to clean it all again before he comes because a lot of dirt can happen in 4 weeks!)
11. Get the swing and bouncy seat ready (just wash the covers as they were all bought used-great condition and for GREAT deals, and all you have to do is add soap and water! Love good deals)
12. Order proper diaper-washing soap.
13. Do you get the idea?
So, you might ask, what's the problem? When you're gargantuan and carrying around said 14 lb baby it's very difficult to do a lot of this stuff. And I drop EVERYthing. Seriously. Sometimes I'll drop the same thing like 4 times!? What is that about?
But, as I was folding those sweet little baby clothes last night while watching a little Friends with my hubby, it's all so worth it. I was thinking of holding my snuggly little baby dressed in each of those items (thank you Mom for all the clothes for Nathan!) and I realized it's all going to be okay and I can't wait to meet him and hold him. To nurse him and love him. To see the other kids interact with him (they were fighting over who gets to hold him first and who gets to hold him in our Christmas Card picture! Trying to bargain with each other over those priveleges!) and to see him learn. Pretty sure that these are the reasons women survive pregnancy. :)
Now, some pictures of our adventure to King Ranch! :) And I will try to post a "belly picture" tomorrow-if my belly still fits in the lens of my camera! Ha ha!
*the pictures of the kids in the trees were taken just before we got yelled at to "watch our children" and not to let them climb the trees. Really? We were watching them...and those were good climbing trees (we were having a little picnic in between parts of our field trip)! And this is not inclusive of all that came to the field trip. Unfortunately I did not think to take a group picture until a lot of them were gone. :( We kind of trickled out as it was over...
**disclaimer: the pictures of the ranch and animals were taken from inside the tour bus we rode on so they might be kind of fuzzy looking because of the glass and the reflections of people in the glass.
Friday, October 16, 2009
Thursday-A Good Day!
So, Wednesday was this rotten, awful, horrible day. Apparently Lindsay and I are on the same cycle of bad days. That is not a good combination. We already tend to have the typical mother/daughter conflicts--more on that later--so the last thing we need is to both be having a bad (hormonal??) day on the SAME day. Everything anyone did made her cry and everything EVERYone did made me want to yell. And scowl. And stomp. So, there is Lindsay, crying away about everything which only made me angrier. Tears make me uncomfortable on the best of days. I don't like to cry-and will do everything in my power to stop it. In myself and others.
But Wednesday...brought many tears to our house. And everything about pregnancy was miserable. Every part of my body below my rib cage hurt. And ached. And I thought, "How will I make it through 8 more weeks of this?"
But the dawn comes in the morning, right?
Thursday was far from perfect, but was so much better. In comparison it seemed like a Utopia! Even physically I felt like I could do this for 8 more weeks (7 1/2 now, but who's counting?)
When we didn't accomplish every single school assignment that I had wanted to accomplish it just didn't seem to matter that much.
I am trying something new-not doing very well at it, but hey...you gotta practice to do something well, right? I'm trying to change some attitudes I have in my heart. I got my inspiration from Michelle Duggar. She must be doing something right. So, here's my goal: to smile more than I frown (scowl). Mainly in regards to my children. My children are a gift from God. But I don't often reflect that in the way I act with them. Instead I become this drill sargeant that wants things done "10 minutes ago". They are children. Yes, they need to obey and do what I say (promptly) but I also am their mom. If they are showing "'tude" to me on a regular basis (sarcasm and just plain ugliness) they are probably living what they've learned. Ooops. (There's one negative about homeschooling ;) You can't blame it anyone else! LOL) So, if I want them to be nicer to each other (more positive and not condemning...then I prob'ly need to model that behavior!!! **DING DING** <--that's the "right answer bell"!
So, my goals for the remainder of this week and all of next week (a little at a time...I am human) are:
1. Smile more than I frown/scowl.
2. Say more positive things than negative. Even if it means stretching and searching out positives. It won't hurt me and it will help the kids immensely!
But Wednesday...brought many tears to our house. And everything about pregnancy was miserable. Every part of my body below my rib cage hurt. And ached. And I thought, "How will I make it through 8 more weeks of this?"
But the dawn comes in the morning, right?
Thursday was far from perfect, but was so much better. In comparison it seemed like a Utopia! Even physically I felt like I could do this for 8 more weeks (7 1/2 now, but who's counting?)
When we didn't accomplish every single school assignment that I had wanted to accomplish it just didn't seem to matter that much.
I am trying something new-not doing very well at it, but hey...you gotta practice to do something well, right? I'm trying to change some attitudes I have in my heart. I got my inspiration from Michelle Duggar. She must be doing something right. So, here's my goal: to smile more than I frown (scowl). Mainly in regards to my children. My children are a gift from God. But I don't often reflect that in the way I act with them. Instead I become this drill sargeant that wants things done "10 minutes ago". They are children. Yes, they need to obey and do what I say (promptly) but I also am their mom. If they are showing "'tude" to me on a regular basis (sarcasm and just plain ugliness) they are probably living what they've learned. Ooops. (There's one negative about homeschooling ;) You can't blame it anyone else! LOL) So, if I want them to be nicer to each other (more positive and not condemning...then I prob'ly need to model that behavior!!! **DING DING** <--that's the "right answer bell"!
So, my goals for the remainder of this week and all of next week (a little at a time...I am human) are:
1. Smile more than I frown/scowl.
2. Say more positive things than negative. Even if it means stretching and searching out positives. It won't hurt me and it will help the kids immensely!
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
Each and Every Day
Right now, each and every day is a struggle to do the things I need to be doing. What I'd really rather do is lay around and nurse my aching hips and back. But, the show must go on and since I'm the ringmaster of this circus/show...so must I.
I got to have an ultrasound of the baby last Friday and he's doing well. All of google's dire reasons for excess amniotic fluid don't appear to apply to us or our baby. He is, however...big! I was not surprised. He should be "around" 3 pounds but is instead weighing in at about 4 pounds. I know that there is some room for error, but I think less so at 30 weeks than at 36-38 weeks. So, I'm sure that they're not too far off. Taking all 3 kids with me to the ultrasound appointment was...interesting. (In the interest of trying to be positive). Lindsay sat and was enthralled by the whole thing. Totally interested in the baby and what is going on (but she's a 9 year old girl-I wasn't surprised!). Jared and Haley? Took one look at the baby on the screen and then were DONE. Great. So, they rough-housed and fought and played. Knowing mom was trapped on that table with jelly all over my belly...what was I going to do? We made it through it though and I think it was good for them to see the baby again (first time in 12 weeks). Seems as if all is well. I just have a little extra fluid and a big baby!
My house is not showing my need to "nest" at this point. I really want to but by the time I finish with schooling the children (which is a must obviously) I have nothing left. I can barely drag myself in to cook dinner for my family. This is tough. I must say, Michelle Duggar is some kind of woman....
I got to have an ultrasound of the baby last Friday and he's doing well. All of google's dire reasons for excess amniotic fluid don't appear to apply to us or our baby. He is, however...big! I was not surprised. He should be "around" 3 pounds but is instead weighing in at about 4 pounds. I know that there is some room for error, but I think less so at 30 weeks than at 36-38 weeks. So, I'm sure that they're not too far off. Taking all 3 kids with me to the ultrasound appointment was...interesting. (In the interest of trying to be positive). Lindsay sat and was enthralled by the whole thing. Totally interested in the baby and what is going on (but she's a 9 year old girl-I wasn't surprised!). Jared and Haley? Took one look at the baby on the screen and then were DONE. Great. So, they rough-housed and fought and played. Knowing mom was trapped on that table with jelly all over my belly...what was I going to do? We made it through it though and I think it was good for them to see the baby again (first time in 12 weeks). Seems as if all is well. I just have a little extra fluid and a big baby!
My house is not showing my need to "nest" at this point. I really want to but by the time I finish with schooling the children (which is a must obviously) I have nothing left. I can barely drag myself in to cook dinner for my family. This is tough. I must say, Michelle Duggar is some kind of woman....
Monday, October 5, 2009
I Have a Reason!!!
So, for all of you complete strangers (and some acquaintances) who insist on asking me if there is only one baby in my belly or if we're really sure on the due date or just like to comment on how absolutely huge I am...
I went to the doctor today and when she was measuring my belly with her little tape measure, she said I am measuring 34 weeks pregnant. Ok, this would not be that big of a deal, except I'm only 29 weeks pregnant. I had her redo the measurement thinking the way I was laying on her table had surely skewed the measurement. Nope. 34 weeks.
The good news? She thinks this is prob'ly mostly extra fluid. The bad news about that? That horrible glucose test I did today (ok, drinking the stuff isn't really that bad, it's the jittery, nauseated feeling that comes afterward) might just show us the reason for the excess amniotic fluid I'm carrying around! Yikes! So, if I eat salt I swell up like a blow fish...if I can't eat sugar or carbs and have to watch all that stuff...what am I going to eat? Don't forget, pregnant women should not eat lunch meat. Hmmm.
Baby is doing well, jumping around in there-or should I say swimming!? I don't have to go back for 3 weeks, so that's a good sign. And as for the results of my testing...they'll call if I "fail" it, so no news is good news, right? :) Candy anyone?
I did have a little faith in humanity restored again. I had my heart set on a Breakfast taco from Taco Cabana after I left the dr (needed some "real" food to combat that nothing but sugar to eat all day) but got there at 11:15. The breakfast menu is good until 11. I told the guy in the speaker thing..."uh oh, I don't know what to order...I was going to have a breakfast taco but I'm 15 minutes late" and he said "I'll make it for ya, what do you want?" So nice! :) He could've been hard nosed 0about it! And add a strawberry smoothie to that...
I went to the doctor today and when she was measuring my belly with her little tape measure, she said I am measuring 34 weeks pregnant. Ok, this would not be that big of a deal, except I'm only 29 weeks pregnant. I had her redo the measurement thinking the way I was laying on her table had surely skewed the measurement. Nope. 34 weeks.
The good news? She thinks this is prob'ly mostly extra fluid. The bad news about that? That horrible glucose test I did today (ok, drinking the stuff isn't really that bad, it's the jittery, nauseated feeling that comes afterward) might just show us the reason for the excess amniotic fluid I'm carrying around! Yikes! So, if I eat salt I swell up like a blow fish...if I can't eat sugar or carbs and have to watch all that stuff...what am I going to eat? Don't forget, pregnant women should not eat lunch meat. Hmmm.
Baby is doing well, jumping around in there-or should I say swimming!? I don't have to go back for 3 weeks, so that's a good sign. And as for the results of my testing...they'll call if I "fail" it, so no news is good news, right? :) Candy anyone?
I did have a little faith in humanity restored again. I had my heart set on a Breakfast taco from Taco Cabana after I left the dr (needed some "real" food to combat that nothing but sugar to eat all day) but got there at 11:15. The breakfast menu is good until 11. I told the guy in the speaker thing..."uh oh, I don't know what to order...I was going to have a breakfast taco but I'm 15 minutes late" and he said "I'll make it for ya, what do you want?" So nice! :) He could've been hard nosed 0about it! And add a strawberry smoothie to that...
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