The Most Wonderful Time of the Year....

I don't know if I really agree with that. I'm sorry. I know that kind of makes me a scrooge. Or a grinch. Or something that's not good. I just get frustrated that there is so much expectation regarding Christmas.
::All the right gifts for people that want for NOTHING.
::Perfect, crafty decorations.
::Endless supplies of money needed(for all of those "right gifts" and "perfect, crafty decorations")
::Advent activities that my kids will love (but I have to come up with them!)

But there are some things I love!
::Family! I will get to see my nephews this Christmas (well, 2 days after) and my new sister-in-law and brother!
::Finding the right gift! You know that moment...when you find it! Last night I found this:The only problem being that it *might* not get here on time. Oops. ( Nathan loves helicopters. And trucks. And trains. and motorcycles. When asked what he wanted for Christmas, his answer was "a Camaro". The kid cannot tell you what color the car is but he knows when it's a camaro!? Really?)











::Christmas parties! I know, I know...they can be kind of a pain but this year my hubby's work party was a little bit fancy-schmancy! And I loved it! I got to get all dressed up-which I don't have much excuse for these days!

::Cooler Weather! Ok, it is relative where we live and I'm definitely thankful that we don't generally see white at this time of year but I like when I can turn the air conditioner off.

::Kids' excitement! So fun to tease them. And let them think you're not going to get them what they want the most! I think my kids are going to be very happy this year! Even considering our new policy regarding Christmas gifts (see next post)...

::That moment when the craft comes out! I made a wreath this year and have about 10 other projects going (yes, my dining room table is a mess...but it's fun anyways).

::Pulling out all of the old ornaments. I'm not into a designer/decorator's tree. We do the ornaments my mom gave me from when I was a kid, the ornaments marking our first Christmas married and all the ones our kids have made or have been engraved with birthdays, etc! And I love that homey, eclectic look. (And colored lights and icicles in case you're wondering....although I didn't get my icicles this year. Boo)

::Slowing down. I know, so many people are busier at this time of year but for us things tend to slow down-at least mandatory things. Scouts is not even meeting for the rest of this month! No sports, etc! It's lovely.

I do think though that we need to remember that while most of us are celebrating the happiest season of all....some are not. And we should remember them in thoughts and prayers. Those who have no family, those who are mourning the loss of a family member, those who are struggling to feed their family basic food-forget about all the decadent loveliness we are putting in our mouths! We don't have to feel guilty for enjoying our family, food, and everything that goes with Christmas...but just look for ways to help and pray for people who are in need.

Tragedy

Tragedy is a word we use all too often. Awful. Devastating. Unbearable. All of those words. It is not a tragedy/awful/devastating/unbearable when you can't find the purse you wanted on sale, nor is it a tragedy/awful/devastating/unbearable when you miss a call from a friend or miss a party or whatever floats your boat. We throw those words around so easily...
 


This is what is a tragedy/awful/devastating/unbearable: kissing your small child and sending them to school never dreaming you'll never see them alive again. Another tragedy? Telling your 3 year old that his or her big brother or sister is never.coming.home. Never. And they can't even comprehend the word NEVER. But when? Where is s/he? I just want to play with him/her. Or even worse, maybe you DIDN'T kiss that child that morning. Because there was plenty of time for that later, and besides, we are in a hurry and you're late. And don't forget your lunch and your homework. And good heavens, did you brush your teeth? Why is your hair sticking up? People are going to think you're an orphan. What if those were the last words?
You dropped them off or put them on the bus for what should be a safe day away from mom. School should be the place where it's okay. But too often it's not. From bullying to massacres...
The odds are this will never happen to most of us. But, what if it does? What if this morning were your last morning with your child?
I have my beliefs on gun control as I know most have their minds made up on it. But either way, this is not a political issue. It's a heart issue. There are grieving parents out there and siblings and grandparents and aunts and uncles...and children of teachers and administrators that were shot protecting children! And it's not about political issues. I could cite all the rhetoric in the world and give you statistics about deaths and the percentages caused by gun violence...but if it's "only" 11,000 (I did see that number on a chart)...when you're a family member of one of those "11,000" it's definitely more than "only". And the family and friends of over 11,000 people that died don't want to hear that. When you're going through grief, statistics don't make you feel better.
This is why I have posted nothing on Facebook regarding this tragedy. I have seen a million posts that I agreed with politically but I feel like it would be exploitative if I posted them right now. When the tiny caskets have not even been lowered. When the whole story isn't even out and straight (good heavens, the brother was tarred and feathered and he wasn't even there!).
The point of all of this: HOLD YOUR BABIES. Don't wait for a tragedy/horrible/awful/devastating thing to happen. It might be too late....

Already?

Lately it's been really hitting home that my kids are just plain growing up on me. I didn't okay it. And I'm not really okay with it on most levels. Sure there are good things-like increased independence (any mom who hears "I'm DOOOOONNNNNNNEEEE" coming from the bathroom knows what I'm talking about) and kids that can help out are great!

But what about kids that have their own opinions about everything?
And kids that want to hang out with their friends more than they  want to hang out with their family?
I know it's appropriate and normal but that doesn't mean I have to like it, right? I have an almost 13 year old. She will be 13 in April (only 2  months after my 5 year old will be 6!) This is just all way too fast. I was going through some pictures to make room for more on my blog and some of the baby pictures I came across....

This is the reason we are taking a whole season off from sports. It's a really tough call to make because watching your kids play the sports they like and are good at...it's really cool! But, spending their entire childhood yelling at everyone to "hurry up" because "we're late" again....doesn't really appeal to me. I'd like to remember something else-and more importantly I'd like for them to remember something else. Dinners with family. Walks. Game night. All the things we used to do before we got so involved in sports that we didn't have time.

I'm not knocking sports. Not at all. But, we just need a break from the constant running. What are the odds that my kids will play sports beyond their teenage years? Probably..ZERO. What are the odds they will need to know how to be a good family member? Almost guaranteed! So, that's why. The time is flying by and we want to spend some of it just being a family.

Just Say No!

Do you remember when you were a kid and you felt like your parents lived to tell you no!? I sure do. I think I thought they derived some kind of perverse pleasure from denying me what I wanted (to have or to do). Now that I'm a mom of 4 I realize that it is not the funnest (yeah, I know. Not really a word but it fits) part of my job to tell my kids no. I don't enjoy it at all.

And since my parents were not mean spirited (well, they aren't, not past tense since they're still living) I doubt they enjoyed it any more than I do.

Who loves seeing the look of disappointment on their child's face when they can't do something or have something they long for?

I hate saying "no" to my kids. I hate disciplining my kids. I hate telling them that something they did wasn't "good enough". I mean, I don't say it like that but that's what I feel like they are thinking when I correct them on a chore or schoolwork. I feel like I'm giving them the message that their efforts aren't cutting it. And that's not the message I want to send. I want them to be confident and know that their mom said "yes" to everything I could! And that I"m proud of their effort when they give something their all. 

Well, I had a really cute picture but I am out of storage on google.com or whatever. I have to figure this out...... :(

Baby-hood Over

My baby is turning 3. I know, he's still little but for some reason that's the age that babyness is over in my mind. The diapers are (long) gone, nursing is (longer) over, He has been speaking in complete sentences and using big words for quite a while now (and slowly but surely the baby words are disappearing). One of the last vestiges of babyhood in our house is the crib. And it just seems that when he turns 3 he should not be in a crib anymore. I don't know why, it just feels wrong.

But yesterday when I went into the boys' room to start "packing it out" to paint it and put the new carpet in...at which time we will take the crib down...I just couldn't face it. My stomach felt sick and it just made me want to go to my own bed. So, the room is even worse off than it was (also looked at his newborn clothes-sniff sniff) and I still have to face it! I might just go today and buy a stinkin' mattress. Get this over with. Donate the crib to someone who really needs one...that might make me feel better about it (my mom's idea). Move on. I normally love redoing my kids' rooms. It needs paint. It needs carpet. I will focus on that! Pics to follow! :)

Toys!

I have such a love/hate relationship with toys. I find these toys that I think my kids will LOVE! And so I buy them. Only at Christmas and birthdays for the most part but I'll admit they have more than they need...not as many as some kids for sure, but more than they need.


The other night we were at my mom's house and she has a little basket of select toys she keeps. Nathan was enthralled with those toys and busy the whole time we were there. Way moreso than he is at our house with a bazillion toys! At our house, he gets into everyone's stuff (nail polish on the carpet anyone?) and just kind of throws the toys everywhere. So, I have an idea. I think we will get rid of toys-ruthlessly! And then take some toys and put them in the garage so we can rotate them. So that they are new every few months or year or however it works out. I know, it's not like that is some revolutionary idea...it's been done before. In fact, I read about it in a magazine I'm sure. But doing it in my own home is revolutionary to me!


The same with Haley's toys. We Santa got her a Barbie Dream Townhouse last Christmas. I He really thought it was the perfect thing! I mean, come on, what little girl would not want a Barbie Dream Townhouse? Complete with working elevator and a rooftop garden tub, etc! Ummm, DREAM house? Wanna know how many times she played with it? Probably about 5. It's been almost a year Sure glad it was Santa and not me that paid for that one. *shaking my head*

I am about to redo my kids' rooms because I love to do that and haven't for almost 4 years! But! I'm going to do some serious purging and organizing. I will attempt to take pictures-before and afters, etc for blogging purposes but we will see if I remember.

I'm so ready for a purge of our house! The one thing that really needs to go due to space that I'm not thrilled about getting rid of is the crib. *sniff sniff* The last vestige of babyhood in this house....