So, Wednesday was this rotten, awful, horrible day. Apparently Lindsay and I are on the same cycle of bad days. That is not a good combination. We already tend to have the typical mother/daughter conflicts--more on that later--so the last thing we need is to both be having a bad (hormonal??) day on the SAME day. Everything anyone did made her cry and everything EVERYone did made me want to yell. And scowl. And stomp. So, there is Lindsay, crying away about everything which only made me angrier. Tears make me uncomfortable on the best of days. I don't like to cry-and will do everything in my power to stop it. In myself and others.
But Wednesday...brought many tears to our house. And everything about pregnancy was miserable. Every part of my body below my rib cage hurt. And ached. And I thought, "How will I make it through 8 more weeks of this?"
But the dawn comes in the morning, right?
Thursday was far from perfect, but was so much better. In comparison it seemed like a Utopia! Even physically I felt like I could do this for 8 more weeks (7 1/2 now, but who's counting?)
When we didn't accomplish every single school assignment that I had wanted to accomplish it just didn't seem to matter that much.
I am trying something new-not doing very well at it, but hey...you gotta practice to do something well, right? I'm trying to change some attitudes I have in my heart. I got my inspiration from Michelle Duggar. She must be doing something right. So, here's my goal: to smile more than I frown (scowl). Mainly in regards to my children. My children are a gift from God. But I don't often reflect that in the way I act with them. Instead I become this drill sargeant that wants things done "10 minutes ago". They are children. Yes, they need to obey and do what I say (promptly) but I also am their mom. If they are showing "'tude" to me on a regular basis (sarcasm and just plain ugliness) they are probably living what they've learned. Ooops. (There's one negative about homeschooling ;) You can't blame it anyone else! LOL) So, if I want them to be nicer to each other (more positive and not condemning...then I prob'ly need to model that behavior!!! **DING DING** <--that's the "right answer bell"!
So, my goals for the remainder of this week and all of next week (a little at a time...I am human) are:
1. Smile more than I frown/scowl.
2. Say more positive things than negative. Even if it means stretching and searching out positives. It won't hurt me and it will help the kids immensely!
Friday, October 16, 2009
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
Each and Every Day
Right now, each and every day is a struggle to do the things I need to be doing. What I'd really rather do is lay around and nurse my aching hips and back. But, the show must go on and since I'm the ringmaster of this circus/show...so must I.
I got to have an ultrasound of the baby last Friday and he's doing well. All of google's dire reasons for excess amniotic fluid don't appear to apply to us or our baby. He is, however...big! I was not surprised. He should be "around" 3 pounds but is instead weighing in at about 4 pounds. I know that there is some room for error, but I think less so at 30 weeks than at 36-38 weeks. So, I'm sure that they're not too far off. Taking all 3 kids with me to the ultrasound appointment was...interesting. (In the interest of trying to be positive). Lindsay sat and was enthralled by the whole thing. Totally interested in the baby and what is going on (but she's a 9 year old girl-I wasn't surprised!). Jared and Haley? Took one look at the baby on the screen and then were DONE. Great. So, they rough-housed and fought and played. Knowing mom was trapped on that table with jelly all over my belly...what was I going to do? We made it through it though and I think it was good for them to see the baby again (first time in 12 weeks). Seems as if all is well. I just have a little extra fluid and a big baby!
My house is not showing my need to "nest" at this point. I really want to but by the time I finish with schooling the children (which is a must obviously) I have nothing left. I can barely drag myself in to cook dinner for my family. This is tough. I must say, Michelle Duggar is some kind of woman....
I got to have an ultrasound of the baby last Friday and he's doing well. All of google's dire reasons for excess amniotic fluid don't appear to apply to us or our baby. He is, however...big! I was not surprised. He should be "around" 3 pounds but is instead weighing in at about 4 pounds. I know that there is some room for error, but I think less so at 30 weeks than at 36-38 weeks. So, I'm sure that they're not too far off. Taking all 3 kids with me to the ultrasound appointment was...interesting. (In the interest of trying to be positive). Lindsay sat and was enthralled by the whole thing. Totally interested in the baby and what is going on (but she's a 9 year old girl-I wasn't surprised!). Jared and Haley? Took one look at the baby on the screen and then were DONE. Great. So, they rough-housed and fought and played. Knowing mom was trapped on that table with jelly all over my belly...what was I going to do? We made it through it though and I think it was good for them to see the baby again (first time in 12 weeks). Seems as if all is well. I just have a little extra fluid and a big baby!
My house is not showing my need to "nest" at this point. I really want to but by the time I finish with schooling the children (which is a must obviously) I have nothing left. I can barely drag myself in to cook dinner for my family. This is tough. I must say, Michelle Duggar is some kind of woman....
Monday, October 5, 2009
I Have a Reason!!!
So, for all of you complete strangers (and some acquaintances) who insist on asking me if there is only one baby in my belly or if we're really sure on the due date or just like to comment on how absolutely huge I am...
I went to the doctor today and when she was measuring my belly with her little tape measure, she said I am measuring 34 weeks pregnant. Ok, this would not be that big of a deal, except I'm only 29 weeks pregnant. I had her redo the measurement thinking the way I was laying on her table had surely skewed the measurement. Nope. 34 weeks.
The good news? She thinks this is prob'ly mostly extra fluid. The bad news about that? That horrible glucose test I did today (ok, drinking the stuff isn't really that bad, it's the jittery, nauseated feeling that comes afterward) might just show us the reason for the excess amniotic fluid I'm carrying around! Yikes! So, if I eat salt I swell up like a blow fish...if I can't eat sugar or carbs and have to watch all that stuff...what am I going to eat? Don't forget, pregnant women should not eat lunch meat. Hmmm.
Baby is doing well, jumping around in there-or should I say swimming!? I don't have to go back for 3 weeks, so that's a good sign. And as for the results of my testing...they'll call if I "fail" it, so no news is good news, right? :) Candy anyone?
I did have a little faith in humanity restored again. I had my heart set on a Breakfast taco from Taco Cabana after I left the dr (needed some "real" food to combat that nothing but sugar to eat all day) but got there at 11:15. The breakfast menu is good until 11. I told the guy in the speaker thing..."uh oh, I don't know what to order...I was going to have a breakfast taco but I'm 15 minutes late" and he said "I'll make it for ya, what do you want?" So nice! :) He could've been hard nosed 0about it! And add a strawberry smoothie to that...
I went to the doctor today and when she was measuring my belly with her little tape measure, she said I am measuring 34 weeks pregnant. Ok, this would not be that big of a deal, except I'm only 29 weeks pregnant. I had her redo the measurement thinking the way I was laying on her table had surely skewed the measurement. Nope. 34 weeks.
The good news? She thinks this is prob'ly mostly extra fluid. The bad news about that? That horrible glucose test I did today (ok, drinking the stuff isn't really that bad, it's the jittery, nauseated feeling that comes afterward) might just show us the reason for the excess amniotic fluid I'm carrying around! Yikes! So, if I eat salt I swell up like a blow fish...if I can't eat sugar or carbs and have to watch all that stuff...what am I going to eat? Don't forget, pregnant women should not eat lunch meat. Hmmm.
Baby is doing well, jumping around in there-or should I say swimming!? I don't have to go back for 3 weeks, so that's a good sign. And as for the results of my testing...they'll call if I "fail" it, so no news is good news, right? :) Candy anyone?
I did have a little faith in humanity restored again. I had my heart set on a Breakfast taco from Taco Cabana after I left the dr (needed some "real" food to combat that nothing but sugar to eat all day) but got there at 11:15. The breakfast menu is good until 11. I told the guy in the speaker thing..."uh oh, I don't know what to order...I was going to have a breakfast taco but I'm 15 minutes late" and he said "I'll make it for ya, what do you want?" So nice! :) He could've been hard nosed 0about it! And add a strawberry smoothie to that...
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