Baby Shower and some thoughts on it

I remember when a baby shower invitation could bring me to tears. Tears of sadness, frustration and wondering if it'd ever be my baby shower. I'm not necessarily proud of those feelings but infertility is a tricky thing. It hurts in an area where we (as women particularly) have a God-given desire. It's from the heart. No, it's not a physical need (as food, water, etc) but it is a longing and an emotional need.
I have now had my turn (several times over!) and happily go to other women's showers. It's a blessing to get to participate in the whole process! A girl at our Bible Study ("girl" because she's younger than me ;) ) is having her first baby and we had her shower last night. I volunteered to make the cake-as I have a desire to A. decorate cakes and 2. Over-schedule myself. I did enjoy it though, and it's such an ego-booster when people tell me how cute the cake is! :) Of course I see all of it's imperfections, but I'm glad others are not focused on that!

The other thing about this Baby Shower is I found out that a dear lady that belongs to our Bible Study-and hosts it at her house weekly-has dealt with the inability to have children. She has such a grace about it and you can feel her contentment. I admire this greatly. She says that her biggest issue is that she doesn't want people to leave her out of "women" things because she doesn't have children (discussions as well as baby showers and children's parties). She has made peace with the fact that she cannot and will not have children and I think that is such an admirable thing. To accept the blessings God has given you and to accept the ones that you are not meant to have. I see no bitterness in her or any envy...What a true lady! :)

"Seasonal" Friends

I know, at this time of the year we automatically think "Seasonal" means Christmas. That isn't what I'm referring to at all. I have learned over my life that certain friends are for a reason, certain friends are for a season. I've learned to let them go when the season or reason is over. Don't get me wrong, it's not a "using" situation, just a fact of life that in this day and age friendships do NOT last forever. Not only do people tend to move a lot, people are extremely busy and we just phase in and out of people's lives. It's sad, and at first I had a very difficult time with it...I don't know if it's more sad that I've gotten used to it, or if that's a good thing.
I guess the main thing I'm referring to right now is the friendships I cultivated online while pregnant with Haley and then we all stayed very close after the babies were born. It was such a sweet thing to know that you could go to this site and feel so comfortable letting it all out. These women knew exactly what you were going through. They were all going through it too (from morning sickness-all day, to sleepless nights, to toddlers driving us nuts-in the best way!) and we were all so close. But then the claws came out-is that inevitable in a group of women? No matter how close emotionally and no matter how far geographically? I'm sad to think that this is the norm.
Once the kid-gloves came off it was all over. Now there is ugliness about political views, SAHM vs. Working moms, and thoughts of someone w/in our group trolling for attention.
Last year at this time we were getting ready to celebrate our babies' first Christmases and exchanging addresses to do our Christmas ornament exchange. Now, there is animosity and ugliness...
The funny thing is, all this drama began right after we switched to a newly created (just for us) website called...of all things..."No Drama Mamas". Maybe we got too self-righteous about our peacefulness and lack of drama, maybe our season was just over. Good-bye February Mama group...it was great while it lasted. :*(

The Surprise is Out Now!

I've been dying to tell about this, but since it was a surprise for my mom (and she occasionally reads this-Hi Mom!) I couldn't write about it.
My brother (Jordan) and SIL (Kat) and nephew Josh have come to visit us! All the way from Florida. Josh is only about 3 mos older than Haley-girl and yet, they've only met once! At Christmas last year:



They are now 11 months older!

We are only on day 3 of them being here so I hope to get some better pictures...but, here are some observations I've made:
1. Boys and girls are VERY different. They are both wild ones, but his brand of wild is different than hers.
2. Haley is willing to share her toys, her food, her home and everything else, but she's not sure why that little boy is being held by "her" nana and papa! He got quite a disgusted look when nana was holding him.
3. It's a good thing we weren't planning on having any more babies...our house is definitely too small for 2 toddlers and 2 children all running amok together! :) But when it's temporary it's not an inconvenience.
There may be more observations to come with the pictures...but that's what I have so far.

The Trials of Reservations

We want to start a new tradition of camping on Thanksgiving weekend. So, keeping in mind that in South Texas late fall is a very popular time for camping-when we all at least hope the intense heat and humidity is gone-I called a few weeks ago to make a reservation at our favorite (so far) grounds for winter camping. We like Lake Texana...but so does everyone else! So, it was booked for that weekend-except for water only sites-ugh, who wants to camp w/o electricity? (Hey, I didn't say we like to rough it...) Anyways, so I make the reservation for Lake Corpus Christi. Meh. Well, that was everyone else in our group's reaction too. So, now what?
Call and cancel that reservation...go to Choke Canyon. Everyone is (while not excited exactly) okay with that one until I get my confirmation email and it tells me (unlike the reservation specialist...) that there is a burn ban in effect. Ok, I can camp in July without a campfire, but in November??? Nah.
We all decide we'd rather have a fire than electricity. So, I call and make the reservation (remember, this is the 3rd time) for Lake Texana. Where we can have a fire, right? Not so much. I find out AFTER making this reservation that there is a fire ban there too! What?
All we can hope is that the rain that has been in most of South Texas has allowed the ban to be lifted. Here are some pictures of other trips to Lake Texana:






It's great fun and keeps you from sitting around wallowing in your fat from all the wonderful holiday food. At least that's the idea!

A Link for those Conservatively Minded

Below is a link to join in on a petition to stop some things that are in the works for when Obama takes office. Don't wait until he's already there...Join in on the petition now.

http://www.grassfire.org/1111/offer.asp?petition=1&CID=111&Ref_ID=1931&rid=18662697

If you don't, I won't know...and everyone has a free choice in this country, so do what is right for you and your beliefs. Also, on this petition you can click on the things you want to petition against and those you don't feel convicted about just leave unchecked!

Some Presidential Ramblings

Well, to say the least I am not pleased by the outcome of the election. I am disappointed in our choice and the gullibility we have as a whole-to think that Barack Hussein Obama can lead our great country in a manner that is consistent with what our forefathers had in mind when they founded this nation. But, we wanted change. So, hold on for the ride. Change is not always good-when you don't know what you're going to get.

I have had a lot of anxiety about this political race from the very beginning-which is funny since I'm not overly political by nature but during my Bible study we read this verse: Daniel 1:22. It reminds us that God sets up kings and deposes them. Aha! So, He has a purpose for whomever is victorious in this race. And no matter who is in power...God is ultimately in CONTROL. And we can rest easy knowing how fleeting this life is. This is such a short time in the scheme of eternity.

Now, I have said my peace. For better or worse Barack Obama is our president-elected by the people. I will pray for him and I will respect him. That does not mean I have to like him or be glad to call him president. But I will do it nonetheless. And I have told my children the same thing.

The Many Ways Motherhood has made me a liar (thanks Jules--I stole your idea-again!)

Remember when you had no children and were the perfect parent? All the things you said you would never do (or that your children would never do?) When you rolled your perfectly made up eyes at the screaming child in line in front of you at the grocery store and the frumpy, harried mom with him or her? I used to be that person-well, I've never been one to be "perfectly made up" but you get the idea.

Here are things I said I (or my child) would never do.

1. Wear boots with shorts. But come on, it's cute!


2. Yell at my child. Need I say more?

3. Co-sleep. Does it really matter? If we're all sleeping?

4. Drive a mini-van. My last two vehicles have been mini-vans and I can't imagine driving anything else.

5. Go out of the house with a child (especially a girl child) with "ratty" hair. Have you seen Haley's hair?

6. Make a big deal about Halloween. I don't necessarily think it's an evil holiday, just not my thing. So, this year I'm having a party (That I can't afford) and making costumes for my kids. **eyes roll**

7. Breast-feed past 1 year. Hmmm, Haley is what? 21 months old now?

8. Give them candy. But how can I eat candy if I don't share? That would be wrong, right?

9. Drag my kids along with me on shopping trips. Ummm, if I want to shop what am I going to do with them? And unfortunately, I love to shop. I did tell Harold though that a 3rd child would save him $$ because I would not be able to shop as much (that, my friends, was not a lie!)

I've learned that in parenting there are very few "black and white" issues. There are so many shades of gray Crayola could make a whole box of 96 just of those grays. It's very frustrating. Some things (that children do) are not right or wrong, they might just be annoying. Or they might be funny (but wrong). Parenting is so much guess work, especially with the first child-the guinea pig. (I've already written her a letter of apology that she can read when she's older). The middle child we think we've gotten it right til we realize that he is suffering from loneliness (he has to have his own room while the girls get to share-what??? I thought kids wanted their own room!) and feels ignored.
And the third child...forget about it. By now we've given up on every parenting ideal we had in the beginning. She eats off the floor (we do draw the line at the pile of dirt we are sweeping up) and plays with bugs. She runs around outside with a droopy diaper and all of her clothes are stained. She climbs things, she falls in fires (ok, "only" once but still...) She's a mess. We're doing the best we can. But we've learned not to make judgments of other people's children or their parenting capabilities. Because there but for the Grace of God go I. I'm so grateful God is watching out for my poor children while I fumble along doing a mediocre job at best!