Most things need attention so that they will thrive-even just to survive, living things need attention, love, commitment and "food". This is all basic knowledge, right?
In the middle of our life-the Three Ring Circus-we seem to have little time to water our marriage. Thankfully, God has blessed us with an ability to just "be" and we tend to be pretty happy-we don't need a lot of fancy dinners or dancing (ha ha) or romance. We can have fun just going to the grocery store together. I know couples who are more passionate than us, but they also fight more. And passion comes and goes in life (depending on your stage and health and many other things) but Harold and I have a friendship that has survived many "discomforts" and even some bad times. I know we have yet to go through some of the worst ones but I think we've garnered enough experience in the smaller griefs and trials to teach us about each other and how to care for each other. Don't get me wrong, we're not "just friends" but that is the most important part (to me) of our relationship. It gives us the ability to have fun together and relax together without always being "on". I love my marriage. Sorry if this is all a bit smooshy for you, but it's true. In a culture that pits men against women and vice versa I have a pretty darn good hubby! (dont' get me wrong, I still enjoy a good "dumb man" joke-becase I know plenty of men that it could apply to! ;) )
All this comes to mind because in this life we are leading (of gymnastics, scouts, homeschooling and homeschool activities as well as upcoming baseball) we have forgotten about us. The other day we realized that we'd been kind of out of sync lately. Not fighting...just not in touch like we normally are. So, we have both made more of an effort to be available. To each other! He waits for me to get done getting Haley to sleep before he goes to sleep, I try to talk on the phone less when he's here...etc You get the picture. I want my marriage to make it through all of this-the kids, the trials and come out strong in the end!
In the words of "our" song by Shenandoah
I wanna be loved like that, I wanna be loved like that
A promise you can't take back
If you're gonna love me I wanna be loved like that
Daddy never gave mama a diamond ring, mama never wanted for anything
But what he gave her it came from the heart
In a bond that was never torn apart
An old man kneeling all alone, plants his flowers in a garden of stone
For seven years now she's been gone
And his devotion is still going strong
That's what I need and want. Not diamonds...just devotion and forever.
(This picture, with us and our na*ke*d baby, illustrates just how much we need to focus on us...I couldn't find a picture of the two of us without any kids from recent years!)