Thursday, June 11, 2009

I Remember!

In the night I attempted to force Haley to go back to her own bed. I remember why it's not worth it. I was up for almost 3 hours in the night. I'm already dealing with some level of insomnia from pregnancy and this did not help. By the time she quit crying and her and Lindsay were back to sleep...I was wide awake. Left to contemplate my guilty feelings for forcing something on her that wasn't right for either of us. I was to the point of wishing I could go and scoop her sleeping little self up out of her bed and put her back in my bed. I didn't, but I wanted to.
So, this morning she woke up. Still in a bad mood. Still very tearful. The problem is not behavioral either. I don't know of any 2 year old that would lay in their bed wide awake waiting til they can fall back asleep. (This was all contemplated after I had spanked her and been very "firm" with her...and at that point felt as if I could not "back down"). So, I sat rocking in the chair we've put in her room while she tossed and turned and alternately laid there quietly and cried. I fought every instinct in me (plus the part of me that was so tired and just wanted to be in my bed) to go and cuddle her up. I wish, this morning, that I had gone with my instincts!
Another thing she's not ready for that I keep pushing her with is potty training. She's not ready. She has yet to even pee on the potty (maybe once) and we already have so many struggles in life...
You'd think I'd learn. Maybe with the next baby.

2 comments:

squirrelgirl said...

Oh, Cara, don't feel guilty. Nobody makes the best decisions in the middle of the night, particularly when they're pregnant and exhausted. I think the bed issue is one of the hardest anyway. As for the potty training, you know she'll do it when she's ready so don't look for extra frustration by trying to force it. Step back and take a nice deep cleansing breath!

carebear7951 said...

Thanks! :) I'll take the cleansing breaths...but I'm still getting an epidural! :p
I'm totally backing off of pt for right now. If she's 2 1/2 or 3 1/2 it'll happen and I really don't care. She's the 3rd child...I no longer have anything to "prove" right?? LOL

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