The Baby-part 2

So, my dh (dear husband) was on board now. All I needed was my bfp (big fat positive-on a pregnancy test that is). If you haven't noticed I'm now speaking the lingo of an online community. With the help of my wonderful friend (Wendy-thanks!) I found a website for those ttc (trying to conceive) and made some wonderful friends while going on this journey. My last pregnancy (from my keyboard to God's ears). I was so thankful to have this support group because I had some complications with Haley. We feared I would miscarry due to some medical complications (placenta previa). I was so excited to finally get past that and be cleared for a "normal" delivery...by that time I was huge! Anyways...this is supposed to be about Haley-girl. We had a very smooth delivery and things were fine. Then I brought her home. For the first two weeks we were in some kind of honeymoon phase. All was well. The baby slept (as well as you'd expect a newborn to anyways) and she nursed well...it was great. We even **gasp** thought we could prob'ly have one more-so Haley would have a sibling her age. HAH!
We no longer think that!
This baby that God gave us...shows His sense of humor! It's a heavenly sense of humor...but humor none-the-less.
She is the cutest little thing. One of the things I remember best about her baby-ness is that she stretched in that adorable baby way ALL the time! It was so sweet. She would stretch about every 2 minutes. So sweet. And funny because she still takes her stretching and waking up very seriously.


Then, that first two weeks-the honeymoon-was over. She began to take over the house. She screamed from 9-12 every night. Awful. We were at a loss. There didn't seem to be anything wrong (Lindsay had reflux but Haley didn't have any of these symptoms). She would nurse until she threw up (but only from over eating) and then scream some more. We finally found out that her daddy could calm her for short minutes during those hours. And so he did. (Thank You God for my husband!) And her bedtime, no matter what we did was somewhere around 2-3 am. Now, if you remember anything about our life...I homeschool the older two. Sleeplessness is not as horrible if it's your first child because you can sleep with the baby...not so with your third and 2 older children that need, not only mommy but an education. It was tough going. But we made it! We've gone through easier stages and harder ones. I've been extremely humbled at times and extremely proud at others. It's been quite the journey, going from 2 (older) children to having 3 and one so much younger.
But this baby is such a blessing. I cannot imagine our lives without her. She is so full of life and other things too.
Every night I sing to her and one of the songs I sing (After Jesus Loves Me-which HAS to be first) is You Are My Sunshine. She is truly our little sunshine. Such a ham and an entertainer. We are learning new things every day from her...We've all had to learn to be a little more patient. When your first child is born you have to make room, but your whole world revolves around that one little person. When your third child comes (almost 5 years after the current "baby" was born) it really is hard. Try babyproofing when your older children's favorite toys are Legos and Polly Pockets. Oh, and marbles...Yeah-not baby friendly. Overall the kids do really well with her though. I know there are times when they could use more attention than they get but they love her and give her a lot of it themselves. I can't believe how fast all of them are growing up though.

Merry Christmas!

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1. Wrapping paper or gift bags? wrapping paper definitely!

2. Real tree or Artificial? Artificial since we've had kids--too paranoid of fire

3. When do you put up the tree? After Thanksgiving-this year it wasn't until into December!

4. When do you take the tree down? ASAP-after Christmas

5. Do you like eggnog? yes

6. Favorite gift received as a child? My Cabbage Patch doll-the year that they came out and she was bought on the black market! :)

7. Hardest person to buy for? My dad...and Harold's dad

8. Easiest to buy for? My kids!

9. Do you have a nativity scene? Yup, but not out this year-due to little Haley...just not worth the fight

10. Do you send cards or email cards? Send cards-every year so far!

11. Worst Christmas gift you ever received? I don't like that question. I would feel guilty even answering it...LOL (but seriously, I don't know)

12. Favorite Christmas Movie? Prob'ly Charlie Brown...but we just aren't into movies that much so I don't have much to choose from.

13. When do you start shopping for Christmas? Early November prob'ly-sometimes if I find a good deal earlier

14. Ever recycled a Christmas present? No

15. Favorite thing to eat at Christmas? Hmmm, food? LOL I'm not real discerning on food. ;)

16. Lights on the tree? Colored

17. Favorite Christmas song? Silent Night, Away in a Manger, Joy to the World...

18. Travel at Christmas or stay home? Stay Home

19. Can you name all of Santa's reindeer's? Nope

20. Angel on the tree top or a star? Angel

21. Open the presents Christmas Eve or morning? Christmas morning

22. Most annoying thing about this time of the year? Commercialism--and that I participate in it. **blushing**

23. Favorite ornament theme or color? Old fashioned hodge podge! Lots of color and variety... (Hey, I have small children...no room for a decorator tree here ;) )

24. Favorite for Christmas dinner ? We do ham, green bean casserole...the norm. I love it all.

25. What do you want for Christmas this year? I never know how to answer that dumb question...I'm not picky

26. Santa or Snowmen? Santa-I hate snow, it's cold ;)

The Baby-Part I

So, about 3 years ago I was in tears. I wanted a 3rd baby soooo bad I would just cry and cry (and I never-literally never-cry). The problem? My husband was satisfied with status quo. He didn't want to rock our world. I waited, and I prayed. A LOT. And not all nice prayers. Some of my prayers were so raw with emotion that only a woman wanting, no not wanting, needing a baby. It's a primal need to have a baby. I had felt this before but the difference was that Harold was on board the other time(s). I don't know which was worse, both of us wanting one and it being totally out of our control (control is an issue I have) or me alone in the wanting and knowing better than to nag, trick or manipulate my husband. He's a pretty strong guy anyway but I could've tried. I knew better though. I value my marriage and therefore knew better. We had gone over this several times since Jared was born and I would break down in tears (not the manipulative kind, just the truly sad ones). Long story short I was going to be in a wedding in Austin. We decided that I would go alone rather than both of us go and drag the 2 kids along-since I would be busy as matron-of-honor. This was at the height of one of these spells where I was so upset-wanting a baby, needing to feel that life inside of me again. I thought sure, after he'd had to do EVERYTHING the whole weekend with the two kids I would never get my baby. I went. After the wedding I drove most of the night to get home so I could go to church with my family on Sunday morning. When I woke (after only a couple hours of sleep)my wonderful husband told my bleary-eyed self that he wanted another baby. You know what I did? I hit him-not violently I'm not a violent person! I thought he was joking. After we cleared up that little misunderstanding I was the happiest (even if tired) I had been in a long time! This wasn't a thing he agreed to just to placate his emotional wife. He gave me all the right answers to let me know that. I never wanted to have a baby w/o him being just as into it as I was. I knew that having 3 kids would be a lot if there was any resentment. He told me (sniff sniff) that he realized how quickly the kids were growing up and how much he wanted to see all the firsts again-the first smile, the first time the baby finds his or her hands and feet, the first word, first step...He was on board! That is installment one...next one coming soon. :)

My Little Man

In helping Jared to do a project for Cub Scouts (He should officially be a Tiger Scout as of the January Pack meeting! Yay!) I have realized just how quickly he is growing. In the past year his face has turned from a little boy's face to a big boy's face. It's amazing just the difference between last December and this one! It makes me kind of sad...these are days I will never have back with my little guy. And I think that it's even more poignant with boys because as the saying goes: Have a daughter and you have her for life, A son's only a son til he takes a wife...
I've seen this with my mom and my brother. We rarely ever get to talk to and see Jordan. Of course he goes to his wife's family's holiday functions and such most of the time. As do we-spend more time with my family that is. I try to think how my mother-in-law must feel sometimes because after all, my husband was once her little boy just like Jared is mine. **sniff sniff**
He can be such a sweet little guy, when he's not wielding a weapon of some sort. Often, when we can't find him we need only to look up-a pole, a tree, the fort...anywhere that is a challenge to get, he's there. He's such a rough and tumble boy but also can be so tender and helpful-asking me what he can do to help and if I need anything. Or just hugging me when I'm sad or have a headache.
It's amazing...how these little kids just get right into your heart. It's too bad that when they grow up and still keep part of it, huh?

100 Things to Do Before I Die

Surprise, surprise. I've decided to copy something I've seen on a few other blogs...Make a list of 100 things to do before I die. Of course it might take me that long to decide what to put on the list, but that's ok, right?

1. Go back to school to become an RN
2. Lead someone to Christ
3. Visit Niagra Falls
4. Take my children to Disney World
5. Renew my wedding vows (we didn't have a "real" wedding)
6. Sleep through the night ;)
7. Leave the continent of North America to visit some incredibly romantic spot-Paris, Italy...
8. Visit Yellowstone National Park
9. Become a grandmother
10.Be debt free
11.Finish my scrapbook (ha ha ha ha)
12.Sit in a rocking chair next to my (very old) husband! I just think that's the best ending to any love story
13.Ride a zip line
14.Leave the continent of NA again to visit somewhere extremely significant in History (Germany).
15.Take ballet lessons
16.

Any ideas for any more anyone??????? Help me!

I Joined the Resistance

I am not going to sit by silently as Barack Obama, Nancy Pelosi
and Harry Reid re-make our nation in their liberal image.

That's why I just joined a grassroots conservative effort to
RESIST Obama's liberal agenda. Please go here to join with me:

http://www.grassfire.org/111/petition.asp?PID=18662696&NID=1

Thanks!


Cara Robertson

Can I Be Sappy?

As I was thinking how fast this holiday season is going-Christmas is a short 21 days away!-I realized it is just an example of the bigger picture. This life is passing quickly! You don't realize how quickly until you have children. I look at the 3 of them and I see that they are growing up-even though when they were babies I had a discussion with each one of them and they agreed not to do that to me, to grow up.

Lindsay is now 8-almost 9! That just seems so big to me. So grown up. She has such opinions on everything and is not afraid to tell me what they are. Even when they are nothing close to mine! We are so different and yet we also have a lot in common. We are readers. I love that I have passed that on to my daughter! On the other hand, she is much more of an "outside the box" kind of person than I am. I follow the "rules"-whether it's how I dress, how I draw or color, or how I play(ed). Lindsay likes to mix different types of toys to play with them how she wants-which for whatever reason makes me crazy! I should embrace her free-spiritedness. There are a lot of things I should do...I should spend more time cuddling this daughter of mine that is quickly growing and will not want my cuddles. I should play and dream with her. I should read to her the classics-Little Women, Under the Lilacs, Alice in Wonderland.... I should spend time brushing the pretty hair of this pretty girl that is mine.

my little girl
so anxious
to be grown
not ready
not ready
still tender
my baby
my little one
so anxious
to be grown
not ready
finding her way
lip gloss and nail polish
tugging her away
from dolls and teddy bears
still holding tight
not ready
don't let go
i'm still your mommy
you're still my baby
my little girl





Jared and Haley's post coming soon...

Where...

have all the bloggers gone???
I guess everyone is busy with holiday stuff and not blogging... :(

Our Thanksgiving Trip!

So, I come back from our annual Thanksgiving camping trip looking something like this:



There is no exciting, dramatic story behind this new me...just the same old, same old. Ever since having had Haley-girl my back is very fickle. It will be fine one minute and I'm flopping on the floor like a darn fish the next. The thing is, I'm not one to be a "damsel in distress". I prefer (even if it's sometimes martyr-ish) to do things myself. I don't want to have to depend on others-I'd much prefer to do things myself and do it when and how I think it should be done. It saves me much agitation in the long run. Except, with this issue I have no choice but to give in to it. There is no powering through this one. I am literally bent at the waist when I walk right now. Not fun.

And, all I did was get the (small, umbrella) stroller out of the back of the van to take a walk at the campground. I guess the twist in something I did killed it for me. Because we never did get to take that walk. Darn. The kids did get to go (thank you Patrick and Kimberly) to the Snake presentation that the State Park was having as well as to play at the park and make some paper snakes later in the day. They had fun and made some cute little snakes and stuff...(except Jared had a fit of perfectionism-which is par for his course-and tore up his "really cute" snake-told to me by Kimberly). I hope they still had fun. I think they did. I did too, all back issues aside.






The weather was great-warm Thursday and Friday until a cold front blew in late Friday night with some major rain-no biggie though, it all dried out the next morning. We had some great camp fires, even better food and nice friends. Oh, and no kids played in the fire. **eyes roll** In my book that makes it a great camping trip! I hope we can continue to do this every year at Thanksgiving. Minus the back incident.








Undoubtedly there would be more pictures but I, the photographer, was incapacitated...

Happy Thanksgiving!

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So, since we all know I'm not that original when blogging and often end up copying others ideas in my posting...why disappoint? I just read Meredith's Thanksgiving post and she listed (beautifully) all of the things she was thankful for right now...And I thought I might take a stab at the same kind of thing! :)

I am thankful for:
1. An awesome God-and that I live in a country where I am free to worship Him!
2. My family and their love-through my whole life. My mom, dad, grandpa and grandma have given me so much my whole life!
3. My husband that loves me and shows me in the little ways every day.
4. My healthy children. When I hear stories of little ones that are so sick and the heartbreak of their parents...I am so blessed that my children are healthy! And to think there were days when I wondered if I'd ever be a mom.
5. A home to live in-that keeps me warm in the winter and cool in the summer.
6. My husband has a job, and one that allows me to stay at home with my kiddos and home school them.
7. Christmas bonus! Takes much of the stress out of the Season!
8. Friends that support me (online and in real life) through it all. Good, bad and ugly. (the situations, not the friends ;) )
9. Plentiful food. Otherwise how could I gripe about being "fat"???
10.Loving and kind mother and father-in-law. Not everyone has that...
11.That I am healthy! I try to remember that one when I'm killing myself exercising-telling myself it's a blessing that I can do that ;)

Again, thanks Meredith for the idea and I hope it catches on and I see lots of these kinds of posts-in a world where there is so much focus on the negative...

This describes this week!

MySpace Graphics & Free Myspace Layouts

Is that horrible to say when you're as blessed as I am??? It's been a rough week, and it's only Tuesday!

My Favorite Moment

We've had a rough week in our house-and it's only Monday. Oy! I've been really off for a while due to a switch in medications I'm trying to make and I haven't been very good at seeing the favorites. But last night at dinner Jared and Haley were sitting next to each other and Jared's tooth hurt (it's loose) and he kind of cried out "Ouch!" So Haley leaned over and (w/o words, because she's my wordless child for the most part)indicated that she wanted to kiss his cheek. And she did.

Of course this was such a fleeting moment that even if I'd had my camera sitting next to me I'd have missed it, so you'll have to just picture it because it didn't get the Kodak moment status this time. :)

Yesterday-well, Saturday!

So, yesterday was great! As part of my b'day "stuff" my mom watched all 3 kiddos so that Harold and I could go eat, find me some jeans for my fat-ness (ugh!) and get my hair cut. It was so nice to eat lunch w/ no one telling me "this isn't want I ordered" and when I answer "Oh yes it is" "But I didn't think it would be like this..." and then Haley climbing out of the high chair and trying to climb all over me-you get the picture right? Eating out with 3 kids is not a relaxing, enjoyable experience. I love my kids, don't get me wrong...it's just not relaxing. I always leave feeling like "Why did I waste my money eating out" NE ways, I digress...

We went shopping and talked (no kids hollering about how long do they have to stay in the store, can they go look at toys, can they go look at their size clothes, can we just go home? and no Haley trying to kill herself climbing out of the basket-again, I digress, this is supposed to be about what did happen, not what didn't!) and I found an outfit that will fit me and I like it! Just jeans and a t-shirt, but it's cute.

Then! We went to get my hair cut where luck was on my side! The lady that has cut my hair since 1995 (and I trust and love!) was there early!! Yay! And had no one waiting! Yay! That is so unusual...she works at Costcutters (which is a "discount" place-and most of her customers are requests, so she's usually backed up before she arrives!) We went a little shorter this time, and I THINK I LOVE IT!!!! :D


So, we had a couple minutes to "spare" and went to Petco to look around for a minute. I have been wanting a dog for quite some time (we are petless save for the one remaining hermit crab-out of 3!) but just haven't felt "ready" to take the plunge. When we get my dog I want it to truly be a part of our family-inside as well as going with us when we go somewhere like camping...so, I pick up this very calm little ball of fluff from one of the local shelters (and this calm was so miraculous in light of the chaos of the other dogs barking all around it) This dog was adorable. A mix of some kind of shepherd (Australian???) and Lab...perfect for what I want!!! Then I watch his brother pee all over himself in his sleep! I put the little guy back-still loving him though, then he squats and poops. Ok, it's over. I remember why I'm not ready. We are still petless-save for that one darn crab that keeps holding on.

Why are 67% of Americans Unhappy?

A. Is it that we have electricity and running water 24 hours a day, 7 Days a week?

B. Is our unhappiness the result of having air conditioning in the summer and heating in the winter?

C. Could it be that 95.4 percent of these unhappy folks have a job?

D. Maybe it is the ability to walk into a grocery store at any time and see more food in moments than Darfur has seen in the last year?

E. Maybe it is the ability to drive our cars and trucks from the Pacific Ocean to the Atlantic Ocean without having to present identification papers as we move through each state.

F. Or possibly the hundreds of clean and safe motels we would find along the way that can provide temporary shelter

G. I guess having thousands of restaurants with varying cuisine from around the world is just not good enough either.

H. Or could it be that when we wreck our car, emergency workers show up and provide services to help all and even send a helicopter to take you to the hospital.

I. Perhaps you are one of the 70 percent of Americans who own a home.

J. You may be upset with knowing that in the unfortunate case of a fire, a group of trained firefighters will appear in moments and use top notch equipment to extinguish the flames thus saving you, your family, and your belongings.

K. Or if, while at home watching one of your many flat screen TVs, a burglar or prowler intrudes, an officer equipped with a gun and a bullet-proof vest will come to defend you and your family against attack or loss.

L. This all in the backdrop of a neighborhood free of bombs or militias raping and pillaging the residents. Neighborhoods where 90% of teenagers own cell phones and computers.

M. How about the complete religious, social and political freedoms we enjoy that are the envy of everyone in the world?

Maybe that is what has 67% of you folks unhappy.

Fact is, we are the largest group of ungrateful, spoiled brats the world has ever seen. No wonder the world loves the U.S. , yet has a great disdain for its citizens. They see us for what we are. The most blessed people in the world who do nothing but complain about what we don't have, and what we hate about the country instead of thanking the good Lord we live here.

I know, I know. What about the president who took us into war and has no plan to get us out? The president who has a measly 31 percent approval rating? Is this the same president who guided the nation in the dark days after 9/11? The president that cut taxes to bring an economy out of recession? Could this be the same guy who has been called every name in the book for succeeding in keeping all the spoiled ungrateful brats safe from terrorist attacks? The commander in chief of an all-volunteer army that is out there defending you and me?

Did you hear how bad the President is on the news or talk show? Did this news affect you so much, make you so unhappy you couldn't take a look around for yourself and see all the good things and be glad? Think about it......are you upset at the President because he actually caused you personal pain OR is it because the 'Media' told you he was failing to kiss your sorry ungrateful behind every day.

Make no mistake about it. The troops in Iraq and Afghanistan have volunteered to serve, and in many cases may have died for your freedom. There is currently no draft in this country. They didn't have to go. They are able to refuse to go and end up with either a ''general'' discharge, an "other than honorable'' discharge or, worst case scenario, a ''dishonorable" discharge after a few days i the brig.

So why then the flat-out discontentment in the minds of 69 percent of Americans?

Say what you want, but I blame it on the media. If it bleeds it leads and they specialize in bad news. Everybody will watch a car crash with blood and guts. How many will watch kids selling lemonade at the corner? The media knows this and media outlets are for-profit corporations. They offer what sells, and when criticized, try to defend their actions by "justifying" them in one way or another. Just ask why they tried to allow a murderer like O.J. Simpson to write a book about how he didn't kill his wife, but if he did he would have done it this way......Insane!

This is a portion of an email quoting David Letterman. He hit the nail on the head!!!
We as a nation are like a spoiled rotten child! We don't think about the things we do have, but we complain about the things we don't have.

Birthday Blues

Ok, so after being a real grump alllll day yesterday (sorry to my kids who were in the way of my grumpiness) and not being able to figure out why, I figured it out. Nope, it's not necessarily that my new meds (anti-depressants) are not working. Nope, it's not because I have awful children (they're good kids-even though they sometimes don't know what day it is). It's not because I perpetually fail at my diet... None of the other reasons I could come up with made sense either. But boy was I cranky!

That was me all day! Well, at the end of the day I finally figured it out! (As I was ranting around mad at everyone) It's because yesterday was the day before today-my birthday! For whatever reason, ever since my 18th birthday I get very moody leading up to it. It's not because I'm getting "older", I really don't care about that-at least not at this point. But every year I just feel so moody about the whole thing. So, hopefully today it's over...since it's the day, the lead-up is done.

to me

They're Gone

Well, my "little" brother and his little family have gone back home to Florida. It's really hard when you only see a baby twice a year to get to know them. We feel like we were just starting to get to know who Josh is, and then they had to leave. :( And who knows when we'll see them again. But, we had a fun time with them while they were here! I have (as promised) some more pics of everyone! :) Well, except me, because who would be behind the camera?? :p







And just a few pictures of my handsome little baseball player! :)