Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Puppies or Kids?

Something that amuses me is the way my kids (and other siblings) can play or lay in a tangle. They're like a litter of puppies. I grew up with only 2 brothers. And they are much younger than I am. I was an only child until I was 10. My first brother was born then. My second brother wasn't born til I was 14! So, all the touching is, well, it's weird to me. My family is also not super touchy. So, it's fascinating to me when I see people touching all over each other.
A few summers ago I babysat for 3 boys that were 8, 9 and 11 years old. They would get to my house in the morning and often lay on the couch and fall asleep. Their mother is the sweetest person-she would let them stay up half the night so they'd rest in the mornings. Ha ha! Anyways, they would lay in this tangle on the couch-arms and legs all over the place.
I think that this leads to people being more inclined to touch. Or maybe it's nature!? I don't know for sure, but I know I'm not very good at it. I'm more of a "personal space" kind of girl. It's one of the things I regret about myself as a mother. I hear friends talk of enjoying cuddling up on the couch with their kids or welcoming kids into the bed in the morning. That's just not comfortable to me, let alone pleasant. Once my kids are past babyhood, I feel super awkward with a lot of huggy-kissy stuff. And even if I fight off that discomfort...I'm sure my body language and hesitation shows it.
I wonder if there's some way to learn to be "touchy feely"!?
Does anyone know?


Jenn said...

I don't have a perfect answer for you on this, but I wonder if you just forced yourself to do it a bit more if it would becomes less irritating to you. I have one little guy who is very in your face and at times his cuddles can be a bit to much. But, I have to remind myself that it is how he shows his love and obviously he needs me to respond to feel loved. I'm not always good at responding to it, because honestly sometimes he picks the oddest times to grab me. Like when I'm on the move walking from one room to the next or it I'm in the middle of doing something.

squirrelgirl said...

I'm getting snuggle overload from Miss K right now. She's feeling a little displaced by Mr D, so she's all over me at every opportunity - and when she's not on me, he is. I feel a little guilty about pushing her away sometimes and I try to think of how she needs me. Maybe that would work for you - just look at how beneficial it will be in the long run for your kids?

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